Polonius At Sea

While reading a journal article of the connections between Samuel Clemens and Shakespeare, I came across another Hamlet reference in Mark Twain's work.  This one is found in his Letters From Hawaii.  (The journal article that led me to the passage is referenced below.)

The section in question is entitled "I Endeavor To Entertain The Seasick Man."  In order to help a nauseous fellow passenger, Twain reads a poem that he has prepared.  It is a paraphrase of a Shakespearean passage rewritten in rhyme to make it easier to remember.  The passage should be familiar to fans of Hamlet.  It is presented below in its entirety.

Polonius' Advice to His Son--

Paraphrased from Hamlet 

Beware of the spoken word! Be wise;
Bury thy thoughts in thy breast;
Nor let thoughts that are unnatural
Be ever in acts expressed.

Be thou courteous and kindly toward all —
Be familiar and vulgar with none;
But the friends thou hast proved in thy need
Hold thou fast till life’s mission is done!

 Shake not thy faith by confiding
In every new-begot friend,
Beware thou of quarrels — but in them
Fight them out to the bitter end.

Give thine ear unto all that would seek it
But to few thy voice impart;
Receive and consider all censure
But thy judgment seal in thy heart.

 Let thy habit be ever as costly
As thy purse is able to span;
Never gaudy but rich — for the raiment
Full often proclaimeth the man.

Neither borrow nor lend — oft a loan
Both loseth itself and a friend,
And to borrow relaxeth the thrift
Whereby husbandry gaineth its end.

But lo! above all set this law:
UNTO THYSELF BE THOU TRUE!
Then never toward any canst thou
The deed of a false heart do.

The reaction of Twain's audience upon hearing the passage was to vomit.  He did not care for the passage, but noted that "if he got seasick again, he would like some more poetry."  A Shakespearean critic, perhaps?


Hirsh, James. 1992. “Samuel Clemens and the Ghost of Shakespeare.” Studies in the Novel 24 (Fall): 251-272.